The Makings of a Good Friend
by MeridaVenture
Summary: Thea and Felicity bond for the first time and both discover the beginning of a good friendship.


Thea walked down the stairs of the basement slowly, lost in her thoughts. It was not until halfway down the steps she realized the lights were on and there was music playing. It was slower music, more along the lines of Mumford and Sons than the week's top 20. Thea knew that Oliver had just left for their apartment and that there was not a mission tonight—the basement should have been empty. As she continued to walk down she noticed that the girl, what was her name, Felicity? Was in the computer chair obviously focusing intently on something. Thea approached her waiting for Felicity to notice her, she wasn't trying to walk stealthily and the other woman should have clued into the sound her footsteps were making. Thea stands right behind Felicity and leans on the counter still unnoticed by the blond woman. Thea decided it was time to get her attention and cleared her throat. The other woman squeaked and brought her hand to her throat.

"Oh My God. Don't DO that. What is it with the Queens always sneaking up on me? It's not polite. Really. I feel like I just ran a sprint."

Thea is already smiling. "I wasn't trying to sneak up on you, you were just really focused on the computers apparently. What are you doing down here so late? Oliver said it would be empty down here?" Thea had been hoping for some alone time and was thinking about maybe working out on her brother's mats. Oliver had understood, choosing to giver her space rather than forcing her to deal with the way she was feeling concerning his revelation about Sara. She still couldn't think the words, _she killed Sara_.

"I come down here when I can't sleep sometimes. There's always something to do, some update, some new information on a guy that Oliver should take out; it keeps me busy and my mind off things. I think of this basement as my space. It feels a lot like home now that I spend so much time here. But, it's changing; I get a lot less alone time down here now. It used to be just the three us, me, Digg, and Oliver, and I always knew where they were so I knew when I would have the place to myself. Now, so many people know his secret that this place feels busier and I don't get to be alone as much. Not that you're intruding! Of course you're not, do you want me to go?"

Thea likes her. She's honest and you can tell she's not hiding anything. She's a breath of fresh air and she can already tell why Oliver made her apart of his team. "No you're fine, please, stay. I'm intruding on you, like you said this was your home before I even knew it was here. I just came to get some space to think…about things." Felicity must know what she did. And suddenly, Thea feels ashamed. What must this woman think of her, a killer? She murdered Sara, and Thea realizes, Sara must have been a friend of Felicity's. Suddenly, talking to this woman is painful and she wants to leave. Fast. Her face must have shown some of her turmoil, not to mention her body language. She had wrapped her hands around her torso without even noticing.

"Hey. Hey. Thea? It's okay. I know what you're thinking about right now, and it's okay. You must know that nobody on this team thinks any differently of you, right? Malcolm is a monster. He manipulated, maneuvered, and drugged you. You're still just a girl, you felt abandoned and overlooked. He made you feel important, taken care of. There is nothing wrong with that, and I would be the last person to judge you. Trust me. My daddy issues are extensive."

Thea swallows heavily and clears her throat. "Thank you, I appreciate it, I do. But it's more than that. I killed Sara. These hands. This body. I feel betrayed by myself. I feel guilty and angry and, and guilty. I feel tainted, like there's this shadow looming over me all the time. I walk into rooms and I wonder if people are looking at me and thinking 'murderer'. I, I…. Thea breaks off, her voice too constricted to continue. Why was she opening up to this women when Thea barely knew her? She shouldn't be putting this on some random stranger. Thea looks up and sees tears in Felicity's eyes.

"Thea, I am so sorry." Felicity's voice is sincere and Thea can feel the sympathy pouring off her in waves. Felicity looks down and it seems to Thea that she is gathering herself for something. When Felicity looks up her face looks determined, her eyes taking on a new intensity.

"You were drugged. You had no control over your actions. There was nothing you could do. You trusted Merlyn to take care of you and he let you down. No, he didn't let you down, he crushed you. There was nothing you could do, it was out of your hands."

Thea is nodding, "I know. I know. Oliver has already said all that. Multiple times. But it was still me. My hands. And I'm so afraid that I will do it again. That this was some kind of gateway and now I have this thing in me that knows I have it in me to kill. I never thought that I would be here. When I was little I wanted to design clothes. I wanted an easy, happy life and to find someone I loved and then get married. When I was little I never imagined some messy, complicated life. And now I'm here, and I've killed someone. Its like with this, it's the end. The true end, the end of simplicity, of a life free of this…this _bullshit_ that I have been dealing with for eight years. I feel like this was it, there's no going back. I'm a murderer and I don't deserve the life I saw myself having."

Thea hadn't known that she felt this way until the words fell from her mouth. She could feel the truth of them though. She could feel the heaviness in her soul, a deep ache that she didn't think she would ever be rid of. She was brought out of her reverie by Felicity.

"That is bullshit, Thea, bullshit. And I should tell you, your flair for drama rivals Oliver's—must run in the family, as well as unfounded guilt and the need to mime Atlas. Let me tell you something, happiness is a choice. It's a choice you make everyday. So you're not the same girl you were eight years ago. That's good Thea, its called growing up. Everyone does it. You're path has been difficult. I know that. I have been watching you for three years. I know that you can deal with this, I know that you can figure out a way to live with this and still find happiness.

You're right, this was an end to simplicity, but not because you killed Sara, but because you were betrayed by someone you thought loved you, by someone that should have protected you at all costs. You know what I wanted to be when I was little? I wanted to be cake taster. I am now an IT expert and you know what? Nothing makes me happier. I changed. Life is weird. It throws things at you, sometimes, those things are sharp. But life gave you a tool, a tool to fight back against everything being thrown at you. Your tool is your brain, its your inner self. It's the thing in the back of your spine that makes you throw your shoulders back and say 'screw you world' I am Thea Queen and I am making the choice, right now and everyday for the rest of my life, to be happy and fuck everything else."

Thea gulps, holding back tears. "You make it sound so easy. But choosing to be happy doesn't mean that going to bed is any easier, that I don't have nightmares, that I am not afraid all the time, that…"

Felcity interrupts, "I am scared too. Since starting with Oliver, I have seen some really hard things. The worst for me was when I was taken by the Count. He was Vertigo's original dealer and Oliver thought he had put him away. Oliver was at court with you and Digg was sick, but, I had a lead and I thought I could check it out on my own. The Count caught me and for hours I was stuck with him ranting at me, touching me, and threatening me. Oliver came and saved me, but that night, and many nights after, I cried myself to sleep. Everything made me jump and I didn't feel safe anymore. It was hard. No one had tried to hurt me like that before. But after a month of quasi depression I said enough. I was done. I decided to be happy again. I still get scared and I am overwhelmed all the time. But I am happy because I _want_ to be."

Thea's eyes are wide and she feels little goosebumps cover her forearms. Felicity is breathing hard and her expression is fierce, determined. Damn, this woman has a point. Thea reflects that maybe she has been swimming in her own misery, not even attempting to pull herself out of the numbing vortex. She looks up at Felicity who now appears to be feeling a little contrite about her outburst.

"Thea, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you. I just felt, I don't know, mad. I hate what has been taken from you and I hate that you have to learn to be so strong. I also feel really passionate about not holding onto guilt that is not yours. Oliver and his self-destructive tendencies kill me."

"No, no, its fine. I needed to hear that. Everybody in my life that I am close to is male and they feel this need to coddle and protect me. It felt really nice for someone to throw some honesty at me." Thea laughs, "My brother got really lucky with you."

Felicity laughs, "tell him that after I've thrown some truth at him. He does not take it nearly as well as you. But hey, I owe you a drink after that. Do you like wine? I always keep a reserve around here, you know, for the late nights of updating. Don't tell Oliver. He would be all like, how do you drive home, blah blah blah."

Thea laughs and says, "my lips are sealed. I love wine. Give me whatever you got."

Felicity looks at her seriously and points at Thea then herself before saying, "Your wish, my command," before bending down and opening the lowest drawer of her desk and reaching all the way to the back. She grabs two plastic wine glasses handing them both to Thea before turning to the back and saying, "just a minute."

Felicity walks to the back of the basement and opens a box and pulls out two bottles of red. "Here are the goods, if we end up having A LOT of fun, I have two more."

Felicity pours two heavy servings into the glasses Thea is holding out. They both stand in silence while they take the first sip. That's when Thea realizes Felicity is the perfect person to ask some questions about her brother.

"So how did my brother find you? How did it all happen? I'm ready to hear some of his stories now that everything's not a secret."

Felicity laughs and starts off with, "First you should know, I have no idea how you didn't figure it out, he has the worst, THE WORST, excuses…"

They talk for hours and somewhere in the fourth bottle Felicity says, "we've been sitting here forever. I need to move, lets dance. Somewhere in my third month working here I decided I couldn't take it here without music and I had Oliver buy a sound system so I could install it. Lets put it to some use."

Felicity walks over to her computer, swaying and unsteady where she pulls up some music files. She glances back at Thea before grinning and promising, "this one is perfect."

Thea listens and then she recognizes the song. "You like Florence?!"

"Like her? Can anyone just _like_ Florence?"

Shake It Out begins to play loudly on the speakers and Felicity starts drunkenly jumping around. Thea stops and stares, "You call that dancing?"

Felicity grins and she says, "I call this doing whatever the hell I want because it feels right."

Thea grins and joins her. When they get to the chorus Thea starts shouting the lyrics with Felicity.

"Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh whoa

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back

So shake him off, oh whoa"

And Thea feels like maybe she has thrown off a couple devils tonight.

After a couple more songs they lay down on the mats exhausted. Thea looks at the clock and notices that a couple hours have passed and knows it's likely that Oliver will be appearing soon.

Damn, she must be omniscient because at that moment, Oliver walks over to the mats and looks down at them weirdly.

She watches him take in the bottles of wine before turning back to take them in. "So, some alone time, Thea?"

Thea giggles, though she's not sure why it's funny. She turns to look at Felicity and they both start laughing. Deep, stomach laughing. The kind of laughing that lightens the heart. She sees Oliver grin at the blond laughing next to her.

"Come on, time to get my girls home."


End file.
